Any Canadian who thinks Americans
are arrogant and dumb
have their suspicions confirmed
every time some disgruntled American voter
threatens to leave for the Great White North
If their candidate is not elected President.
This idle threat is tragically American,
reeking of delusions of exceptionalism.
The myth that we are so wonderful
that Canada will welcome us all.
whose homeland pulls back the welcome mat for foreigners
somehow expect that wherever Americans emigrate
we will be treated just the opposite.
It never occurs to them that Canada may not want us there
perhaps they still think Canada belongs to the U.S.
like Americans did long ago
back when Manifest Destiny aspired to stretch north.
Ignorance of Canadian immigration laws
parallels the Ignorance of our own
as Johnny Cannuck is just as picky as Uncle Sam
when choosing which foreigners to let in.
What else can be expected
when we’re told all our lives
that we live in the greatest nation on earth?
The myth of American supremacy
is the most American thing of all.
Why wouldn’t we see our Americanness
as a virtuous accomplishment
that Canadians would gleefully
welcome behind their borders?
Our reputation precedes us.
When they hear the word “American”,
some foreigners think of loud, boorish tourists
while others think of our foreign policy
where we spread democracy,
one drone strike at a time.
Only one country on this planet
will welcome us just for being American.
Love it or hate it, It’s the US of A.
Land of the free, it never was,
But it’s definitely Land of the Americans.